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Things you hear on RAGBRAI

It could be just about anything.

1. Stop at the first bar on the right, unless it's on the left.

2. Drink up, Shriners! It's time to go!

3. It just doesn't matter.

4. We're on Sprint time.

5. Pass me the Jack Daniels. I need to clean my teeth.

6. I need a smoke. There's too much oxygen around here. ~Burger

7. If you're not having any fun, lower your standards.

8. It's Noon! We're half way!

9. A bad day on RAGBRAI is better than a good day at work. ~Jamie Cowells

10. Just another day in Paradise.

11. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

12. What is it with bikers and pie? ~Brooklyn

13. If ignorance is bliss, then I am ecstatic most of the time.

14. It is by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country
best, since you have to sweat up the hills and coast down them.  Thus
you remember them as they actually are, while in a motor car only a
high hill impresses you, and you have no such accurate remembrance of
country you have driven through as you gain by riding a bicycle.
~Ernest Hemingway

15. LONG RIDER CREED: Faithless is he who says farewell when the road darkens. ~J.R.R. Tolkien

16. If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there. ~Lewis Carroll

17. To know the road ahead, ask those coming back. ~Chinese proverb

18. An intellectual is a man who doesn't know how to park a bike. ~Spiro T. Agnew

19. If you worried about falling off the bike, you'd never get on. ~Lance Armstrong

20. You don't suffer, kill yourself and take the risks I take just for money. I love bike racing! 
~Greg LeMond

21. What happens in the corn field-stays in the corn field!

22. When man invented the bicycle, he reached the peak of his attainments.  Here was a machine of precision and balance for the convenience of man.  And (unlike subsequent inventions for man's convenience) the more he used it, the fitter the body became.  Here, for once, was a product of man's brain that was entirely beneficial to those who used it, and of no harm or irritation to others.  Progress should have stopped when man invented the bicycle. ~Elizabeth West, "Hovel in the Hills"

23. Nothing compares with the simple pleasure of a bike ride. ~John F. Kennedy

24. ABC News interview with Lance Armstrong after RAGBRAI 34: "I've been on a lot of bike rides, but nothing like this... It took me an hour to figure out that I would be coming back. ...That's what these people do. They ride all day long. They eat coconut cream pie, pork chops, beer, and they keep riding. That's epic!"

25. After six beers, anything you say doesn't count. ~Danny Dunn

26. The eating is getting in the way of my drinking and biking. ~Brady Muff

27. The biking is getting in the way of my eating and drinking. ~Ashley

28. The road goes on forever and the party never ends. ~Keen Robert Earl

29. Welcome to the dark side. ~Danny to Barb on her first hypotenuse

30. If you have a kick stand, you can park anywhere. ~Terry Klein

31. Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep going you must keep your balance. ~Albert Einstein

32. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me. ~Emo Phillips

33. Get a bicycle. You will not regret it, if you live. ~Mark Twain

34. Every time I see an adult on a bicycle, I no longer despair for the future of the human race.
~H.G. Wells

35. The bicycle, the bicycle surely, should always be the vehicle of novelists and poets.
~Christopher Morley

36. About Cactus Juice: I didn't like the first sip, but it got better. ~Casey Mooberry

37. Bring your standards down to RAGBRAI level. ~Jack Flaherty

38. Sometimes the road less traveled, is less traveled for a reason. ~Jerry Seinfeld

39. Just because I slept with you last night, doesn't mean that I will ride with you tomorrow. ~Also very Anonymous

40. If you can't ride fast, at least you can look good. ~Doc Van Winkle

41. Ad for Rapha cycling gear: Rules For The Road - "You have to look good when you are riding, you have to impress your adversary with your elegance. To look good is already to go fast." ~Paul Fournel, Need for the Bike

42. Some times life's bad choices turned to be good. ~Father Jack Flaherty

43. Beer fills me up too much. Just give me the hard stuff.

44. We've got all week to get there. ~Bob Brooks

45. Floss after every 12 pack.

46. You can make me grow older, but you can't make me grow up!

47. No matter what, Beer is our friend!

48. The bicycle is a curious vehicle.  Its passenger is its engine.  ~John Howard

49. Why should anyone steal a watch when he could steal a bicycle?  ~Flann O'Brien

50. For instance, the bicycle is the most efficient machine ever created:  Converting calories into gas, a bicycle gets the equivalent of three thousand miles per gallon.  ~Bill Strickland, The Quotable Cyclist

51. The bicycle is just as good company as most husbands and, when it gets old and shabby, a woman can dispose of it and get a new one without shocking the entire community.  ~Ann Strong

52. After your first day of cycling, one dream is inevitable.  A memory of motion lingers in the muscles of your legs, and round and round they seem to go.  You ride through Dreamland on wonderful dream bicycles that change and grow.  ~H.G. Wells, The Wheels of Chance

53. Cycle tracks will abound in Utopia.  ~H.G. Wells

54. The sound of a car door opening in front of you is similar to the sound of a gun being cocked.  ~Amy Webster

55. Things look different from the seat of a bike carrying a sleeping bag with a cold beer tucked inside.  ~Jim Malusa

56. All bicycles weigh fifty pounds.  A thirty-pound bicycle needs a twenty-pound lock.  A forty-pound bicycle needs a ten-pound lock.  A fifty-pound bicycle doesn't need a lock.  ~Author Unknown

57. Chasing records doesn't keep me on my bike. Happiness does. ~ Lance Armstrong after his third Tour de France victory

58. Bicycling is a big part of the future. It has to be. There's something wrong with a society that drives a car to workout in a gym. ~ Bill Nye the Science Guy

59. “Elvis would have needed to cycle 160.74 miles at 17 mph to burn off his 65,000-calorie daily intake. Conclusion: What killed Elvis was his chronic lack of cycling.” ~ Gary Rimmer

***If you have more, please email them to the webmaster.***

Last updated on January 18, 2010

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